five poems
by Colin McGuire
Wrestlemania
You are the Ultimate Warrior
and I am the Undertaker
thudding
like boulders above the living room
while Mum and Dad watch Casualty.
I try to pick you up.
You squash me with a stone-cold stunner.
I try to carry you
but you have me flat on the floor.
I hit back with a brainbuster
and you play dead.
I mock slap your face to wake you up
you are alive again
squeezing my throat
until I can’t breathe.
‘I’m taking you with me,’ you say
throwing me over your shoulder
like a corpse.
Heaven is Only Twenty Minutes Long
A taking down
of shelves
wavering on the
coast
pulling on
a slackened rope
the thwack of ball
against brick
a chandelier
crashing on rock
a strand of hair
snagged between teeth
shock of birds wings
like a thousand hands waving
a spool of negatives
covered in frost
sudden hush
of an airlock sucking shut
screech
of a rewound cassette
a camera flash
like a lightning strike
a room
filled with falling feathers
the glance of a blade
the snatch of lullaby
Brotherphasia
Younger Brother, Older Brother, Deceased Brother, Estranged Brother,
Adopted Brother, Biological Brother, Foster Brother, Soul Brother,
Lost Brother, Missing Brother, Forgotten Brother, The Brotherhood
of Man, The Brothers of Destruction, The Muslim Brotherhood, Big
Brother Watch, The Brother’s Brother Foundation, The Christian Brotherhood,
Brother Industries, Brothers in Arms, The Brothers of Auschwitz, Blood
Brothers, The Secret Brotherhood of Freemasons, The Brothers Karamazov,
The Brothers Grimm, The Chemical Brothers, The International Brotherhood
of Electrical Workers, The Syndicate of Bother, The Confederacy of Bicker,
The Network of Bloomer, The Consortium of Builder, The Agency of Bachelor,
The Alliance of Bleachers, The Council of Butcher, The Committee of Binder,
The Guild of Bonder, The International Union of Bromate, The League of Brethren,
The University of Breathers, The School of No Bother, The Shelter for Slow Brooders,
The Commission of Bratwurst, The Order of Bicker, The Institute for Late Bloomers,
The Coalition of Brush Strokes, The Academy of Bin Loads, The Federation of Blotches,
The Fellowship of Blemishes, The Guild of Blood Type, The College of Bloodstream,
The Academy of Bonds, The Institute of Birthdays, The Building for Beginnings.
High on Neuroticism
Maybe I’ve touched a lamppost inappropriately.
It’s public pole openness. I’m sexually attracted
to clotheshorses flirt by hanging my boxers on it.
I’ve harmed ants on the street killing their children
under foot. I’ve groomed a spaniel to lick my face
and allow me to pick up his poo. I’ve rolled joints
from pages in The Bible lay awake in a catechism
of sexual confusion. I’ve drank mushroom tea
hallucinating glow-in-the-dark skeleton bros.
All the time wishing I was on the spectrum
with a house diagnosed freebasing crystal grief
high on a personality disorder. Person-centred?
Psychodynamic? CBT? Equine-assisted?
Sound bath? Hypno? Touch healing?
I’ll try anything.
Let me see my fractures glitter.
Inject tiny mirrors into my eyes.
A Deer Eats Flowers in a Graveyard
while droplets
of dung
cascade like
coins from
a slot
machine.
His nostrils
are chimneys
smoking in
the cold air.
A hoof is
sucked into
the dirt,
tongue licking
and tearing
heads off,
antlers scuffing
the head stone.
Only stems left,
a nest of
broken antennas.
Photo of Colin McGuire
BIO: Colin McGuire is published by Red Squirrel Press and Speculative Books. He won the Out-Spoken Prize for Best Poem and Film for The Glasgae Boys in 2018. An except from his memoir features in the Scottish Queer anthology Fierce Salvage. His new collection Ultraviolet is out with Bad Betty Press in 2026.