melancholia

by Mileva Anistasiadou

[AUDIO TRACK: Richard Wagner – “Tristan und Isolde: Prelude to Act I”. The music begins in utter silence: a slow, melancholic phrase on the cellos.]

ACT I: THE BEFORE UNIVERSE

EXT. CITY STREETS - DAY
The sky is a clear blue. The world moves at a steady, ordinary pace.

INT. OFFICE / APARTMENT - CONTINUOUS
I go to work and eat and sleep, like I am a high-functioning, depressed Justine, surrounded by a calm Claire world. I don’t let anything crumble, but I’m at the verge constantly, walking a tightrope over an abyss no one else can see. To cope, I romanticize everything and beautify moments, because I want beauty to save me from something I can’t put into words and I can’t explain.

EXT. THE OUTSIDE WORLD - NIGHT
The world isn’t ending. Nothing much changes. I feel sad without a reason, but I do my best to live. I mask the vacuum inside with pleasant smiles. People can’t really see me, but when they do, they wonder and ask what makes me sad and I can’t answer.

INT. APARTMENT - NIGHT
The glow of a smartphone screen illuminates the room. I watch reels and photos on my feed, with people building sadness to then romanticize and sell it and I laugh at how my sad shadow has turned into a trend.

[AUDIO CUE: The Wagner prelude builds slightly, adding a tense, woodwind layer.]

[AUDIO SHIFT: The Wagner theme reaches its famous "Tristan chord’, a sudden, complex dissonance that feels like a heavy breath being held, before swelling into a dark wave of strings.]

ACT II: THE AFTER UNIVERSE

EXT. THE INTERNAL LANDSCAPE - CONTINUOUS
The clear blue sky shatters. The atmosphere grows heavy, and dark.

INT. THE RE-ORDERED WORLD - DAY
I go to work and eat and sleep, like I am a calm and composed Justine, surrounded by a panicked Claire world. I am allowed to grieve now. The outside matches the internal landscape, and I am home finally, because grief is home to me. I’ve practiced grief for a long time, and I’m prepared. I’ve been grieving for so long with no apparent reason that now it comes naturally, now that there is a reason. Because after Dad died, sadness is here as it has always been.

EXT. THE COLD SEA - NIGHT
Everyone else panics and drowns in grief. I stand steady in the rising water. I am the teacher now. I look at their panicked faces and tell them, it hurts, but it’s alright. They don’t believe me. They haven’t felt grief before and they don’t know what grief can do, and they are dead frightened. I don't drown in grief, because I know how to swim and stay afloat, unlike people who have never stepped into the cold sea and are now thrown violently into the waters. This vastness terrifies them.

[FADE TO BLACK.]
[The Wagner prelude slowly resolves into a fading whisper of strings.]

SUPERIMPOSE ON BLACK

The world has finally caught up to my climate; the catastrophe is finally real and I am its master, because I know disasters, and when Melancholia hits, I bloom in grief.

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